The Good Place (TV Series)
Help Is Other People (2019)
William Jackson Harper: Chidi Anagonye
Photos
Quotes
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Brent Norwalk : Man, crazy twist, huh? It's like something out of a Chip Driver novel.
Chidi Anagonye : Leave me alone, Brent.
Brent Norwalk : I'm kind of freaking out over here, man. You're my only real friend.
Chidi Anagonye : No, I'm not your friend. I don't even like you.
Brent Norwalk : But you helped me.
Chidi Anagonye : Yeah, I did, because I have this stupid moral code that forces me to help everyone. But you have never helped anyone, because you don't care about other people. Which is the bare minimum that a person has to do, just care a little about the other people around you, and you can't do it.
Brent Norwalk : What are you trying to say here?
Chidi Anagonye : [slowly and deliberately] You are a bad person.
[cut to Eleanor and the rest of the crew watching from outside]
Eleanor Shellstrop : You can do this.
Michael : Come on, dum-dum. Faster.
[long pause]
Brent Norwalk : No, I'm not.
[gets up and backs away from Chidi, eyes widening]
Brent Norwalk : I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not a bad person. I'm not. I'm a good person!
[glances around the room in desperation]
Brent Norwalk : Oh, man... Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no... No, no...
[pause]
Brent Norwalk : Look, Chidi... whatever happens next, I, um... I need to say this to you, all right? I am... I am so, so sor...
[countdown clock reaches zero and the experiment freezes]
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Chidi Anagonye : You're not going to the Best Place! Don't you get it? They're torturing you! They're torturing all of us. Because this is the Bad Place.
[camera zooms in on Eleanor and Michael, who cackle maniacally]
Eleanor Shellstrop : Oh, man! I can't believe you figured it out!
Brent Norwalk : Wait... he's right? This is the Bad Place?
Eleanor Shellstrop : Yeah. Damn it, he's right.
Michael : We had a good run, though, didn't we?
Eleanor Shellstrop : Yeah, we did.
[they both laugh]
Brent Norwalk : So no Best Place?
Eleanor Shellstrop : [mockingly] "Oh, so no Best Place?"
Michael : Oh, Brent, you big white oaf! Never change, bud.
Eleanor Shellstrop : Well, I guess we should let 'em know you guys are on your way.
Michael : Yeah.
Brent Norwalk : Wait. On our way where?
Michael : The actual Bad Place. They let us toy with you a little just for kicks, but now you're going...
[points downward]
Michael : And trust me on this: it's a lot worse.
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Simone Garnett : Look, wherever we are, I do not want to be here when the clock hits zero, okay? Now might be our only chance to escape.
Chidi Anagonye : Not without Brent.
John Wheaton : Do you really think if the roles were reversed he would waste any time rescuing you?
Chidi Anagonye : Maybe, if Elle Macpherson were nearby and he wanted to impress her or he thought I was a prince he could ransom. That's not the point. He is a person in a hole! I have a duty to help get him out. What he would do is irrelevant.
Simone Garnett : I don't think it is. If you do a science experiment a thousand times and always get the same result, you move on. We've given Brent a thousand chances to be a good person. In one of them, he was so awful, you punched him in the face.
Chidi Anagonye : Okay, but when I did that, I thought cutting him out of our group meant that he would have to find another place *in Heaven* to hang out. That's changed. I can't just leave him.
[pause]
Simone Garnett : Well... I respect your position.
Chidi Anagonye : [face falls] I respect yours.
[Simone walks away and gets into Brent's Escalade]
John Wheaton : Look, I know everything's really scary right now, but I just have to say it: that was the most boring breakup I've ever seen.
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Brent Norwalk : Well, right at the beginning, I talked to Mike and Eleanor, and they were like, "Yeah, don't tell anyone this, but there's a place better than this: the Best Place. And that's where you're headed, amigo."
Chidi Anagonye : I don't think they actually called you amigo.
Brent Norwalk : I had to go through the year here. Kind of a test, I guess, which, obviously, I aced. So at midnight, I'm in the first Escalade out of here, baby.
Simone Garnett : Brent.
Brent Norwalk : Yeah?
Simone Garnett : Think about this.
Brent Norwalk : Okay.
Simone Garnett : How could YOU get into the Best Place? You would literally have to be one of the most incredible people in the universe.
Brent Norwalk : [He pauses, thinking] I mean, it makes sense to me. I don't know what to tell you.
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Simone Garnett : Think rationally. Isn't it weird that she only told one of us that we're soul mates?
Chidi Anagonye : Is it odd? Yes. Does it mean that Eleanor's motives are questionable? Also yes. But does it suggest that she wasn't being truthful? Yes. Okay, I'm starting to see your point.
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Simone Garnett : Did you find anything?
Chidi Anagonye : Just some song lyrics Michael wrote: Here's a trippy little ditty/'bout a train to groovy city/open up your freaky crystal mind/ and we'll have a cosmic good time.
Simone Garnett : See, that makes me think we're in hell.
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Tahani Al-Jamil : Simone, look at this logically. We are in paradise! There's fresh air, mountains, Janet! And yes, some of us are under 5'10", but other than that, it is literally perfect here!
Simone Garnett : No it is not. Jason is proof! And if you need more evidence that this isn't the Good Place, clearly he's not the only one who doesn't belong.
[looks pointedly at Brent]
Brent Norwalk : Actually, she's right.
[Everyone stares incredulously]
Brent Norwalk : And I know it for a fact.
Chidi Anagonye : ...for the first time ever, I am desperate for you to keep talking.
