Goosebumps (2015)
Ryan Lee: Champ
Photos
Quotes
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Zach Cooper : You're him, aren't you? You're R.L.Stine.
R.L. Stine : R. L. who? I don't know who that is.
Zach Cooper : Oh really? Just as well cause his books suck.
Hannah : What are you doing?
Zach Cooper : I can't decide which I hate more: "Monster Blood" or "Go Eat Worms".
Champ : I'm so confused!
Zach Cooper : You see the endings coming from a mile away. It's like, stop trying to be Stephen King, man.
R.L. Stine : [slams on the brakes] Let me tell you something about Steve King. Steve King wishes he could write like me. I've sold way more books than him, but no one ever talks about that!
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[from trailer]
Champ : The Abominable Snowman just crawl out of a book, that doesn't just happen!
R.L. Stine : You just released every monster I've ever created!
Champ : What was that?
R.L. Stine : It's the Invisible Boy.
Champ : [getting slapped by Brent the Invisible Boy] Ow!
R.L. Stine : Ah, he's such a crack up.
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Zach Cooper : She's locked in this house and her dad's a psychopath.
Champ : Does she have a friend?
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Champ : Y'know how they say teenagers have no fear of death? That they're never gonna get hurt? Well not me, OK? I was born with the gift of fear.
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R.L. Stine : What are you doing here? Go home!
Zach Cooper : No! No, no. Not until you explain what's going on.
R.L. Stine : No, no, no. I can't explain it!
Zach Cooper : We were almost eaten by Frosty the Snowman, which should be impossible, by the way. So try.
R.L. Stine : Okay, look! Where do I begin? When I was younger, I suffered from terrible allergies that kept me indoors. And all the kids threw rocks at my window and called me names. So I created my own friends. Monsters, demons, ghouls to terrorize my neighbourhood and all the kids that made fun of me. And they became real to me. And then one day... they actually... became... real. My monsters literally leapt off the page. As long as the books remain locked, we're safe, but when they open, well, you've just seen what happens.
Champ : I'm allergic to dust mites.
R.L. Stine : What's your point?
Champ : I'm just saying, I have allergies too, so I understand.
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Zach Cooper : How far are we from the high school?
Hannah : Not too far. We can cut through the cemetery.
Zach Cooper : I'm sorry, a cemetery?
Hannah : God, relax. The high school's just past the woods on the other side.
R.L. Stine : Wait, how do you know that?
Hannah : Uh, sometimes I get a little stir-crazy and go exploring.
R.L. Stine : When?
Hannah : At night after you go to bed.
R.L. Stine : You're grounded.
Hannah : That is so unfair.
R.L. Stine : No, it's fair.
Zach Cooper : Guys guys, you're both bringing up good points, but let's keep moving while you argue.
[walks away with Hannah]
R.L. Stine : Sneaking off in the middle of the night with strange boys.
Champ : Unbelievable.
R.L. Stine : Shut it.
[walks away]
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Champ : [Stine and the kids are hiding inside the Wayfield Foods grocery store, watching through the windows as the giant praying mantis tears Stine's car apart looking for them] Why'd you come up with something so freaky?
R.L. Stine : I just have a knack for it, I guess.
[the mantis drops the car]
R.L. Stine : Oh, no! My Wagoneer! I had such low mileage on it.
