30 Rock (TV Series)
Ludachristmas (2007)
Alec Baldwin: Jack Donaghy
Photos
Quotes
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Jack Donaghy : [Reaching for the restaurant check] Now, Dick, let me get...
Dick Lemon : Ahh-ah-ah Jack, it's on me. Wouldn't be a Lemon party without old Dick!
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[Liz's brother Mitch had an accident as a teenager and believes it's still 1985]
Jack Donaghy : Oh in his mind Reagan is still President?
Jack Donaghy : [to Mitch] You lucky bastard.
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Liz Lemon : Nice to have some positive reinforcement, isn't it?
Jack Donaghy : Well, it's only positive reinforcement when they say it to you. In my case they're just stating the facts. I do look like the Arrow shirt man, I did lace up my skates professionally and I did do a fabulous job finishing my muffin.
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Jack Donaghy : See mother, not all species eat their young.
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Jack Donaghy : Mother, I'm sorry, but the Lemons invited me out, and I couldn't say no. They're very nice people.
Colleen Donaghy : Oh, nice. I'll show you nice. Let's all meet down at the soda shop while this country turns into Mexico.
Jack Donaghy : Now, you see, they don't say things like that. They're very polite to each other.
Colleen Donaghy : I suppose you think that they're more nurturing than I am.
Jack Donaghy : Mother, there are terrorist cells that are more nurturing than you are.
Colleen Donaghy : Be careful. I'll cry. You give me 10 minutes with the Lemon family and I'll have them tearing at each other like drag queens at a wig sale.
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Margaret Lemon : Knock knock! It's just the Lemons. We've come to drop off a little goodbye present.
Jack Donaghy : Oh, thank you!
Margaret Lemon : Oh, my goodness! What a beautiful office. Oh, your mother must be so proud of you.
Dick Lemon : Wow, look at this carpet. I feel like we should take off our shoes. Should we take off our shoes?
Jack Donaghy : No, please sit down and make yourselves comfortable.
Margaret Lemon : Well, we don't want to bother you. We know you must have big plans.
Jack Donaghy : Well, I was going to drive up to Vermont and visit my girlfriend, C.C.
Margaret Lemon : Oh, I love that name, C.C!
Dick Lemon : Ooh, I'll bet any girlfriend of yours is a real winner.
Jack Donaghy : Well, she is a congresswoman.
Margaret Lemon : Oh, my goodness!
Dick Lemon : A congresswoman!
Jack Donaghy : And she does have her own Lifetime movie.
Margaret Lemon : Lifetime! Wowsers!
Jack Donaghy : Why don't we cut the charade and you two tell me what exactly it is you want from me.
Dick Lemon , Margaret Lemon : [shocked pause, then they burst out laughing]
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Mitch Lemon : [poses in chair] Hey, Dad, take my picture. Look, I'm the lady from "Flashdance!"
Margaret Lemon : That's a good flashdance, honey.
Jack Donaghy : [whispers to Liz] "Good flashdance."
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Jack Donaghy : What did your mother mean when she said that you were a beautiful genius? Was she taunting you?
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Colleen Donaghy : Let's change the subject. Politics.
Dick Lemon : We don't discuss that stuff. Life is too short.
Jack Donaghy : Really? Life is too short?
[whispers to Colleen]
Jack Donaghy : Because your life seems endless.