SpongeBob SquarePants (TV Series)
Chocolate with Nuts/Mermaidman and Barnacleboy V (2002)
Tom Kenny: SpongeBob SquarePants, Mom, Maitre'd, Geek Fish, Pillow Fish, Dirty Bubble
Photos
Quotes
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[SpongeBob and Patrick are selling chocolate]
SpongeBob SquarePants : Remember, Patrick, flatter the customer.
[knocks on door]
Fish : Hello?
Patrick : I love you.
[Fish slams door]
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SpongeBob SquarePants : Would you like to buy some chocolate?
Chocolate Fish : Chocolate? Did you say... chocolate?
Patrick : Yes, with or without nuts.
Chocolate Fish : Chocolate? CHOCOLATE? CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE!
[SpongeBob and Patrick run away]
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SpongeBob SquarePants : We're not doing so well Patrick. We need a better approach; a new tactic.
Patrick : I know, let's get naked.
SpongeBob SquarePants : No, let's save that for when we're selling real estate.
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Chocolate Fish : [shouting] CHOCOLATE!
SpongeBob : No! No! Noooo!
Chocolate Fish : AHAHAHA! FINALLY! I've been trying to catch you boys all day! Now that I've got you right where I want you...
Chocolate Fish : [normal voice, holding up a pile of cash] I'd like to buy all your chocolate.
SpongeBob : [chocolate falls out of Patrick's pants and he and SpongeBob melt] Thank you for your patronage.
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Mermaid Man : You fiends can't win. You're out-numbered.
Barnacle Boy : You senile bag of fish paste. There are three of us and only one of you.
SpongeBob SquarePants : Make that two.
ManRay : The Quickster.
Squidward : three.
Barnacle Boy : Captain Magma.
Patrick : Four.
The Dirty Bubble : The Elastic Waistband.
Sandy : Five.
Barnacle Boy : M-M-M-Miss Appear.
Mermaid Man : And me makes 10. I think.
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SpongeBob SquarePants : [SpongeBob and Patrick are selling chocolate] Remember, Patrick. Flatter the customer. Make him feel good.
[knocks on door]
Customer : Hello?
Patrick : I love you.
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SpongeBob SquarePants : Remember, Patrick, focus.
[knocks]
Customer : Yes?
SpongeBob SquarePants : Good afternoon, sir, we're selling chocolate bars.
Customer : [Patrick's eyes zoom in and out on the customer] Why is Chubby here staring at me?
Patrick : Focusing.
Customer : Back up, Jack!
[slams the door on Patrick's eyes]
Patrick : Oof!
[moves his eyes around]
Patrick : Nice place you got in here.
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SpongeBob : How about we help you?
Mermaid Man : No, that's a terrible idea! I've got it! How about *you* help *me*?
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SpongeBob SquarePants : Quick, Patrick, without thinking: if you could have anything right now, what would it be?
Patrick : Um... more time for thinking.
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[Spongebob and Patrick have decided to use lies and flattery to sell their chocolate]
SpongeBob SquarePants : [to Elderly Lady] Hello, "young" lady.
[winks at Patrick]
SpongeBob SquarePants : We're selling chocolates. Is your mother home?
Elderly lady : [shouts] Ma!
[tiny wrinkled worm of a fish in a wheelchair comes out of the house]
Even OLDER Lady : What? What? What's all the yelling?
[SpongeBob and Patrick look at the mother with shock]
Even OLDER Lady : You just can't wait for me to DIE, can you?
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SpongeBob SquarePants : What was the reason we bought those bags?
Patrick : Um... he said we were mediocre.
SpongeBob SquarePants : Right! He made us feel special.
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SpongeBob SquarePants : [Looking through the magazine Fancy Living Digest with Patrick] Look at all these glossy pictures of a higher standard of living!
[pointing at a picture]
SpongeBob SquarePants : This guy's so rich he has a swimming pool in his swimming pool!
Patrick : [Pointing at a picture of a rich guy surrounded by bags of money] This guy's got shoes!
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Mermaid Man : So, who wants to save the world?
SpongeBob : I do!
Patrick : I do!
Sandy Cheeks : I do!
Squidward : I don't.
Mr. Krabs : Oh, yes you do, no world means no money! So go save the world, or you're fired!
[Squidward crosses his arms and grumbles in protest]
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SpongeBob SquarePants : [Selling chocolate door-to-door] Hello, sir, would you like to buy some chocolate?
Chocolate Fish : Chocolate? Chocolate! CHOCOLATE! CHOCOLATE!
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SpongeBob SquarePants : Floppin' flounder, Mermaid Man! Makeout Reef!
Mermaid Man : [pounding the table] Those fiends! Attacking hormonally stressed-out children!
Squidward : [smiling dreamily] Ah, Makeout Reef. Good times, good times.
