- Unicorn: I can't tell you what a relieve it is to know that I have been taken by the very best professionals. I despise the second rate.
- Commander LeParge: This is catastrophic.
- John Steed: [sipping his brandy] Well it's certainly not a five-star Napoleon, but I'd hardly call it catastrophic.
- John Steed: The situation is catastrophic. Steed, this is no time for jokes. On the contrary, if you've faced as many problems as I have, You'd realize that the only saving grace was a sense of humour.
- Marco: [speaking into a makeshift walkie talkie] Most ingenious, Steed. If you try a double cross, I press my button.
- John Steed: [answering through intercom] And if you try anything, the Unicorn will be looking for a new horn.
- Minister: The Unicorn. He has a triple D rating.
- Purdey: Which means he's in the top five of the Good Spy guide. A ruthless killer.
- John Steed: A ruthless, brilliant killer.
- Commander LeParge: They have asked for the Unicorn, the Unicorn they must have.
- John Steed: Well indeed they can
- Commander LeParge: [relieved] Aaah.
- John Steed: There's only one problem...
- Commander LeParge: There can be no problems, monsieur.
- John Steed: Well it's the Unicorn. He's just a teeny bit dead.