NCIS (TV Series)
Bikini Wax (2005)
Michael Weatherly: Anthony DiNozzo
Photos
Quotes
-
Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd : Give it five seconds.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : Until what?
Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd : Until he notices there's a...
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Bikini contest!
-
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : [discussing the crime scene] It's a public restroom, Boss. It's really disgusting.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs : It could be worse.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : How could it be worse?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs : Could be a men's room.
-
Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd : Does that say "Sex Wax"?
Abby Sciuto : That it does. It comes in Cool, Warm and Tropical.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : How does it work?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Don't worry about it, Probie. Pretty sure you still need a girl first.
-
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : [seeing their victim in a bathroom stall] That is one hell of a swirly.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : A "swirly"?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : You take a kid by the ankles, dunk him in the toilet, then flush. Usually reserved for dorks. Does it look familiar, probie?
Special Agent Timothy McGee : I don't think so. Noogies, sure. Wedgies, an occasional melvin. But, uh, no.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs : If you two don't start working, I will show you hazing. And the Marine Corps does not do wedgies or noogies or melvins.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Thank you, boss.
-
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : I love the beach. Reminds me of college.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : I thought you went to Ohio State.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : I'm talking about spring break, probie.
-
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs : She knew she was pregnant. Any idea about the father?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : She used a pay phone to call him, but his cell was turned off. She said she left a message.
Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd : [laughing to herself] That's your worst nightmare, Tony.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : [taunting] So, how's it going with those letters, Kate?
Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd : I'm working on it. Thanks, Tony.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs : How long?
Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd : Two days, three tops.
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs : You've got four.
Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd : [surprised] Really?
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs : Hours.
Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd : [deadpan] Sounds about right.
-
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : [speaking of photos of Jordan] In the article, Petty Officer Jordan said they were taken by her boyfriend.
Special Agent Timothy McGee : Thought she didn't date.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Well, she was pregnant, McGee. There's only one way that can happen.
-
Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd : [as Tony's leaving for vacation] Try not to embarrass yourself, Tony.
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Come on, Kate. I'm way too grown up for that.
-
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : [about Spring Break] Probie, my stories alone would make you a man.
-
[the DNA test proves positive]
Abby Sciuto : Ding-ding-ding-ding! We have a winner! Tony, tell us what he's won!
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : [pretending to speak into a microphone] Well, Abby, he's won an all-expenses paid island vacation to sunny Leavenworth!
Agent Caitlin 'Kate' Todd : [deadpan] Keep your day job.
-
Lisa Kerr : She was doing a spread with two other girls for GSM. It was called "Naughty in the Navy". Hit the stands a couple months ago
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : I remember that issue, good layout
Special Agent Leroy Jethro Gibbs : What is GSM?
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : Get Some Magazine, it's like Playboy but less risqué. They both have really great articles.
-
Abby Sciuto : Do you know how small a molecule is?
Special Agent Timothy McGee : I do.
Abby Sciuto : Shut up McGee!
Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo : I really like this new Abby.