House M.D. (TV Series)
Acceptance (2005)
Hugh Laurie: Dr. Gregory House
Photos
Quotes
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Dr. Gregory House : Look I know you're friends with her, but there is a code: Bros before hoes, man.
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Stacy Warner : I met Mark at a fundraiser that happened to be held at a...
Dr. Gregory House : You met me at a strip club.
Stacy Warner : You were the worst two dollars I've ever spent.
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Dr. James Wilson : Do you know why people are *nice* to other people?
Dr. Gregory House : Oh, I know this one! Uh, because people are good, decent, and caring. Either that or people are cowards. If I'm mean to you, you'll be mean to me. Mutually-assured destruction.
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Dr. Gregory House : [to Dr. Cuddy] What's with hiring a male secretary? J-Date not working out?
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James : You can't go in there.
Dr. Gregory House : Who are you and why are you wearing a tie?
James : I'm Dr. Cuddy's new assistant. Can I tell her what it's regarding?
Dr. Gregory House : Yes. I would like to know why she gets a secretary and I don't.
James : I'm her assistant, not her secretary. I graduated from Rutgers.
Dr. Gregory House : Hmm. I didn't know they had a secretarial school. Well I hope you took some classes in sexual harassment law. Does the word 'ka-ching' mean anything to you? I'm going in now.
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Dr. Robert Chase : How's an inmate on death row get his hands on heroin?
Dr. Eric Foreman : Are you serious?
Dr. Gregory House : Man knows prisons. When we got a yachting question, we'll come to you.
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Dr. Gregory House : Prep Clarence for surgery.
Dr. Eric Foreman : Care to share with the class?
Dr. Gregory House : Oh, come on. Do I have to spell it out for you? Pheochromocytoma. Actually, I'm not sure how you spell it.
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Dr. Gregory House : [House is eating lunch while sitting next to a patient in a coma] He doesn't mind... I asked.
Dr. James Wilson : You're getting crumbs all over him!
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Dr. Gregory House : [Clarence is screaming as he's getting his MRI] There's Waldo.
[House pushes a button so Clarence can hear him]
Dr. Gregory House : Found it Clarence.
Clarence : Turn it off! Turn this damn thing off!
Dr. Gregory House : [to Chase and Foreman] Keep him in there until you guys see it too.
[House walks away. Chase gasps and starts to point. Foreman finds it also]
Dr. Eric Foreman : Son of a bitch.
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Dr. Gregory House : Wilson's a fool. I'm an idiot.
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Dr. Gregory House : [gets a page while in coma-guy's room] Death-row-guy is dying.
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[Cameron has just left the room]
Clarence : Oof. That's the finest piece I seen in ten years.
Dr. Gregory House : I coulda hit that.
Clarence : And you didn't?
Dr. Gregory House : Eh.
Clarence : Then you're the one that should be locked up.
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Dr. Gregory House : I *love* rare!
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Stacy Warner : I had to do what I thought was right.
Dr. Gregory House : It's the only reason anybody does anything.
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Dr. Gregory House : There it is. Keep him in there until you guys see it too.