- Monica Geller: Ross, the neighbors ate all my candy!
- Dr. Ross Geller: Mine stole my newspaper! It's like a crime wave!
- Chandler: [Ben's about to ride his first big boy bike] Here Ben Let Me Help You With That
- Ben Geller: Thank you Daddy!
- Dr. Ross Geller: No, No No one daddy... Two mommies.
- [Monica's been leaving candy for the neighbors outside her door, but they got hooked on it]
- Chandler: Hey! Pipe down! What is the matter with you people? This woman was trying to do a nice thing for you. She was making candy so she could get to know all of you and I bet that not one of you can tell me her name. Am I right?
- Neighbor: ...Candy lady?
- Chandler: [mockingly] No not "Candy Lady"!
- Joey: [pushing the neighbor aside] Let me know if we have candy!
- Chandler: Alright, you know what? Forget it, all of you, forget it! You've ruined it! Go home, you've ruined it!
- Joey: Yeah, you ruined everything! You ruined it!
- Joey: [he goes into the apartment with Monica and Chandler and starts eating the candy]
- Monica: Thank you. I was really scared for a while, I mean, somebody slipped a threatening note under the door.
- Joey: [takes the note] Oh, yeah. Sorry about that. Mob mentality...