Clone High (TV Series)
Escape to Beer Mountain: A Rope of Sand (2002)
Will Forte: Abe Lincoln, Narrator
Photos
Quotes
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Abe Lincoln : Have you ever been so attracted to someone that you're afraid you'll blurt out something stupid?
Joan of Arc : I have a rash on my back.
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Gandhi : [to JFK] Party at your place on Friday, right? Rockin!
Abe : Yeah, psyched for the rager, JFK... dog!
JFK : I will see you there, and by will, I mean won't! Hahaha!
JFK : [walks out, comes back in] 'Cause you're not invited. I, uh, wasn't sure if I was clear earlier. So, uh, you're not. Invited, that is.
JFK : [walks out, comes back in] To my party!
JFK : [walks out, comes back in] Forgot to wash my hands!
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Eleanor Roosevelt : [Eleanor Roosevelt has a rather mannish physique] It's time for the Presidential Fitness Test! Where we make you even more insecure about your body by judging you while you perform arbitrary physical tasks!
Abe : Can't believe we got Eleanor Roosevelt as our gym teacher.
Joan of Arc : Yeah he's great. Hey Abe, tonight I finally have a night off from the help hotline, which is community service, and I wanted to know if you wanted to carpool to JFK's party...
Joan of Arc : [Becoming apparent that Abe isn't listening] You know, to save gas...
Eleanor Roosevelt : [Interrupts and gets in Joan's face] You like talking, Of Arc? Well you can TALK your tight little buns on down to the Principal Scudworth's office!
Eleanor Roosevelt : [Joan leaves, Eleanor Roosevelt watching her] Slowwwwwly. Ohhhhhh yeah.
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Abe Lincoln : How am I gonna get the beers?
Gandhi : I've got an idea. Tell him he heard you wrong - tell him what you actually said was "I'll get the *beards*...
Abe Lincoln : That doesn't make sense.
Gandhi : But if you think about it, it would still be a pretty sweet party.
Partygoer : [in Gandhi's thought bubble, wearing a beard] Whoo! Great party!