- Ernie 'Coach' Pantusso: Sam, a nuclear bomb just got Boston.
- Sam Malone: What?
- [Sam and Diane exchange glances]
- Diane Chambers, Sam Malone: Derek's here.
- Ernie 'Coach' Pantusso: They're catching on.
- Diane Chambers: [about Sam's brother, Derek] Oh Sam, he's not that great. The man can tell an interesting story, he's met a few interesting people, but he's just a man, like any other man you'd meet in Greek mythology.
- Ernie 'Coach' Pantusso: [Sam's brother is coming to visit] Let me do it. I'm a smoothie about breaking bad news.
- [Coach goes over to Sam's office door and knocks]
- Sam Malone: Yeah?
- Ernie 'Coach' Pantusso: Sam, your apartment burned down. You lost everything.
- Sam Malone: Oh, my god. Really?
- Ernie 'Coach' Pantusso: No, no, no. Your brother's in town. He's on his way over. Makes you feel better, doesn't it?
- Sam Malone: I hate it when you do that, Coach.
- Diane Chambers: Sam, you talk alot about our having a dalliance, but I've always been told that "barking dogs don't bite."
- Sam Malone: Bi-ting. Is that what you're into?
- Diane Chambers: Do you know what bothers me? There are women upon whom this works... and they are allowed to vote and drive cars.
- Diane Chambers: Derek just wants to fly me out to Martha's Vineyard tonight.
- Sam Malone: In a plane or on his back?
- Sam Malone: I think that you and Derek will make a great match.
- Diane Chambers: Really?
- Sam Malone: Yeah. Both of you think that you're perfect, and one of you is right.