The Brady Bunch (TV Series)

To Move or Not to Move (1970)

Florence Henderson: Carol Brady

Photos 

Quotes 

• Alice Nelson : Well, this whole thing kind of depresses me, Mrs. Brady. I got my routine all worked out here. I don't know if I'll be able to function some place else.

  Carol Brady : But, Alice you will function, won't you? I mean, just because we're moving, you're not going to leave.

  Alice Nelson : Me? Leave the Brady family? You couldn't get rid of me if you tried. I'm a hundred-and-twenty-pound boomerang.

  Carol Brady : A hundred and TWENTY pounds?

  Alice Nelson : Mmmm, more or less.

• Alice Nelson : Uh oh.

  Mike Brady , Carol Brady : Now what?

  Alice Nelson : The light in the oven is blinking something in Morse code: I'll bet the word is trouble.

  Mike Brady : I'll bet the word's defective switch. I'll check it out later.

  Alice Nelson : Why not sooner? There's something about an oven winking at me that gives me the creeps.

• Carol Brady : [both hear an unearthly moaning]  WHAT was that?

  Alice Nelson : It sounded like a cow died in the driveway.

  [the moan sounds again] 

  Alice Nelson : Oh no, now it sounds human, like somebody in agony.

  Carol Brady : Alice, that DOESN'T sound human.

  Alice Nelson : Oh no... inhuman?

• Carol Brady : Mike, there has to be an explanation for all these strange sounds.

  Mike Brady : I haven't heard any strange sounds.

  Carol Brady : Yeah that's right, you got in after they stopped.

  Alice Nelson : Well there is an explanation alright, the ghosts in the McIntyre house got tired of living alone and moved in where there's more action.

  Mike Brady : Oh Alice, even if you're joking, that's absurd.

  Alice Nelson : Well if I'm not joking, it's not absurd. You should've heard those kids this morning before they left for school, they were as scared as I was.

• Carol Brady : Well Alice, the kids do need more bedrooms, and you know we need another bathroom.

  Alice Nelson : Well the old McIntyre house up on the hill has lots of rooms. It's old but it can be fixed up, it's been for sale for years.

  Carol Brady : I wonder why they haven't been able to sell that house?

  Alice Nelson : The same reason the McIntyres moved out, it's haunted.

  Carol Brady : Haunted? Oh Alice.

  Alice Nelson : I knew the cook, said a lot of weird things were going on up there: voices in the night, chains rattling, lights going on and off.

  Carol Brady : Now Alice, you don't believe that.

  Alice Nelson : The cook did, left the McIntyres flat.

  Carol Brady : And you know as well as I do there's no such things as ghosts.

  Alice Nelson : Maybe not, but they were never able to explain those voices.

• Cindy Brady : That terrible noise woke us up!

  Bobby Brady : What do you suppose it was?

  Alice Nelson : [a loud creaking sounds]  Or is?

  Carol Brady : Well sometimes a loose board will make a house creak.

  Cindy Brady : You sound just like Daddy.

• Carol Brady : Is that McIntyre banshee on the loose again?

  Peter Brady : There's something out here, Mom.

  Alice Nelson : 3 very definite crashes.

  Greg Brady : I'll say there were.

  Marcia Brady : Greg was helping me with that flat tire on my bike when we heard them.

  Carol Brady : Maybe Tiger's wrestling with those garbage cans again.

  Greg Brady : Oh it can't be, Tiger's sleeping in the house tonight.

  Carol Brady : In the house? Why?

  Marcia Brady : He was getting spooked by all those funny noises.

  Alice Nelson : Just like everyone else around here.

  Peter Brady : After all, he's only human

  [another crash sounds] 

  Peter Brady , Alice Nelson : Four!

  Carol Brady : I think we better take another look around.

  Alice Nelson : All of us?

  Carol Brady : There's safety in numbers, Alice, come on.

• Cindy Brady , Bobby Brady : [all hear a loud slamming noise]  What was that?

  Carol Brady : [taken aback]  Ub, hey, wa, it's probably the wind, uh, banging against the shutters.

  Alice Nelson : That would be a good guess, Mrs. Brady, if there *was* a wind, and we had shutters.