- Art Selwyn: Joe loved the beach.
- Ben Lucket: He didn't give a shit about the beach. It was them smooth legged girls in them dental floss bikinis, that's what he liked.
- Art Selwyn: How'd you guys sleep?
- Joe Finley: Alma didn't sleep a wink.
- Art Selwyn: You're kidding.
- Joe Finley: No. Neither did I.
- Art Selwyn: You dog!
- Art Selwyn: There's no justice! If there were, it'd be *me* in there instead of her! *I'd* trade places with *her* in a *heartbeat*!
- Art Selwyn: Beautiful beach, a sunny day and good friends. What more can a man ask for?
- Joe Finley: [Pointing to young girls in bikinis] Can I have some of that please?
- Bernie: You work all your life, you pay taxes, you're a good citizen, and what do you end up with? A tight rug.
- [about the pleasing shock of suddenly seeing all of his long-away friends again]
- Bernie: For crying out loud!
- Doctor: Mr. Selwyn?
- Art Selwyn: [about his wife, Bess] That's me, Doctor! How is she?
- Doctor: She's fine, considering her age. And the fact that she's six weeks pregnant.
- Ben Lucket: [Chuckles, and to Art says] Why you smutty ol' devil.
- Doctor: [Shaking Art's hand who's babbling "Pregnant?"] Very impressive, Mr. Selwyn. This one's definitely going in the books.
- [Art is gladly congratulated by his friends]
- Ben Lucket: [talking to David] It looks to me like what you're doing is listening to a lot of people tell you you can't do it when maybe what you should be doing is listening to yourself say that you can.