Full Metal Jacket (1987)

Arliss Howard: Pvt. Cowboy

Photos 

Quotes 

• Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : How tall are you, private?

  Private Cowboy : Sir, five-foot-nine, sir.

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : Five-foot-nine, I didn't know they stacked shit that high!

• Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : Where the hell are you from anyway, private?

  Private Cowboy : Sir, Texas, sir.

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : Holy dog shit! Texas? Only steers and queers come from Texas, Private Cowboy, and you don't look much like a steer to me, so that kinda narrows it down. Do you suck dicks?

  Private Cowboy : Sir, no, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : Are you a peter puffer?

  Private Cowboy : Sir, no, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : I bet you're the kind of guy who would fuck a person in the ass and not even have the goddamn common courtesy to give him a reach-around. I'll be watching you!

• Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : What's your excuse?

  Private Cowboy : Sir, excuse for what, sir?

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : I'm asking the fucking questions here, private! Do you understand?

  Private Cowboy : Sir, yes, sir.

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : Well, thank you very much! Can I be in charge for a while?

  Private Cowboy : Sir, yes, sir.

• Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : Do any of you people know who Charles Whitman was? None of you dumbasses knows? Private Cowboy?

  Private Cowboy : Sir, he was that guy who shot all those people from that tower in Austin, Texas, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : That's affirmative. Charles Whitman killed twelve people from a twenty-eight-story observation tower at the University of Texas from distances up to four hundred yards. Anybody know who Lee Harvey Oswald was? Private Snowball?

  Private Snowball : Sir, he shot Kennedy, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : That's right, and do you know how far away he was?

  Private Snowball : Sir, it was pretty far! From that book suppository building, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : All right, knock it off! Two hundred and fifty feet! He was two hundred and fifty feet away and shooting at a moving target. Oswald got off three rounds with an old Italian bolt action rifle in only six seconds and scored two hits, including a head shot! Do any of you people know where these individuals learned to shoot? Private Joker?

  Private Joker : Sir, in the Marines, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : In the Marines! Outstanding! Those individuals showed what one motivated marine and his rifle can do! And before you ladies leave my island, you will be able to do the same thing!

• Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : Pickett!

  Pickett : Sir, yes, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : 0300. Infantry. Toe Jam!

  Toe Jam : Sir, yes, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : 0300. Infantry. Adams!

  Adams : Sir, yes, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : 1800. Engineers. You go out and find mines. Cowboy!

  Private Cowboy : Sir, yes, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : 0300. Infantry. Taylor!

  Taylor : Sir, yes, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : 0300. Infantry. Joker!

  Private Joker : Sir, yes, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : 4212. Basic Military Journalism. You gotta be shittin' me, Joker. You think you're Mickey Spillane? You think you're some kind of a fuckin' writer?

  Private Joker : Sir, I wrote for my high school newspaper, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : Jesus H. Christ! You're not a writer. You're a killer!

  Private Joker : A killer, yes, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : Gomer Pyle. GOMER PYLE!

  Private Gomer Pyle : [staring into space]  Sir, yes, sir!

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : You forget your fuckin' name? 0300. Infantry. You made it.

• Private Joker : Is that you, John Wayne? Is this me?

  Private Cowboy : Hey, start the cameras. This is "Vietnam - the Movie."

  Private Eightball : Yeah, Joker can be John Wayne. I'll be a horse.

  Donlon : T.H.E. Rock can be a rock.

  T.H.E. Rock : I'll be Ann-Margret.

  Doc Jay : Animal Mother can be a rabid buffalo.

  Crazy Earl : I'll be General Custer.

  Private Rafterman : Well, who'll be the Indians?

  Animal Mother : Hey, we'll let the gooks play the Indians.

• Private Cowboy : Tough break for Hand Job. He was all set to get shipped out on a medical.

  Private Joker : What was the matter with him?

  Private Cowboy : He was jerkin' off ten times a day.

  Private Eightball : No shit. At least ten times a day.

  Private Cowboy : Last week he was sent down to Da Nang to see the Navy head shrinker, and the crazy fucker starts jerking off in the waiting room. Instant Section Eight. He was just waiting for his papers to clear division.

• Private Cowboy : Don't shit me, man!

  Private Joker : I wouldn't shit you. You're my favorite turd!

• Private Cowboy : I think what she's trying to say is that you black boys pack too much meat.

• Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : Are you shook up? Are you nervous?

  Private Cowboy : Sir, I am, sir.

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : Do I make you nervous?

  Private Cowboy : Sir?

  Gunnery Sergeant Hartman : "Sir" what? Were you about to call me an asshole?

• [the recruits have administered a "sock party" beating on Private Pyle] 

  Private Cowboy : Remember, this was all just a bad dream, fat boy!

• Private Joker : I wanna slip my tube steak into your sister. What'll you take in trade?

  Private Cowboy : What do you got?

• Private Cowboy : Been getting any?

  Private Joker : Only your sister.

  Private Cowboy : Well, better my sister than my mom, and my mom ain't bad.

• Private Cowboy : We're the Lusthog Squad. We're lifetakers and heartbreakers. We shoot 'em full of holes and fill 'em full of lead.

• Private Cowboy : I hate Vietnam. There's not one horse in this whole country. There's not one horse in Vietnam. There's somethin' basically wrong with that.

• [Cowboy is sending Eightball to investigate an area for enemies] 

  Private Cowboy : Eightball, let's dance.

  Private Eightball : Put a nigger behind the trigger!

• Doc Jay : Cowboy!

  Private Cowboy : What?

  Doc Jay : We can't leave him out there!

  Private Cowboy : We're not leaving. We'll get him when the tank comes up.

  Doc Jay : He's hit three fuckin' times, he can't wait that long!

  Private Cowboy : I've seen this before, that sniper is just trying to suck us in one at a time.

  Private Cowboy : [Eightball is shot a fourth time by the sniper and screams]  No!

  [Animal Mother opens fire] 

  Private Cowboy : Goddam it! No! Goddamit cease fire! You can't see the sniper!

  Doc Jay : Man, fuck this! Fuck this shit! I'm going in to bring him out.

  Private Cowboy : No, you sit the fuck down!

  Doc Jay : Cover me!

  [Runs out in the open to save Eightball] 

  Private Cowboy : Goddamit! Fuck!

  [the Lusthog Squad opens fire] 

• Pvt. Cowboy : Don't shit me, man!

  Pvt. Joker : I wouldn't shit you. You're my favorite turd!

• Pvt. Cowboy : I'm squad leader.

  Pvt. Joker : I'll follow you anywhere, scumbag.