The Partridge Family (1970–1974)

Danny Bonaduce: Danny Partridge

Photos 

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Quotes 

• Danny : ...Don't you think one genius in the family is enough?

  Keith : Who might that be?

  Danny : Modesty prevents me from stating the obvious.

  Shirley Renfrew Partridge : Danny...!

  Danny : Well, at least I know my limitations. All I want to be is Howard Hughes.

  Keith : Then why don't you disappear?

  Danny : I refuse to get into a battle of wits with an unarmed man.

• Reuben Kincaid : Danny, come here.

  Danny : [Walks over to Reuben]  Yeah?

  Reuben Kincaid : Go away.

• Danny : I've been a kid, and I've been an adult. And believe me, adultery isn't what it's cracked up to be.

• Danny : I need help.

  Keith : We know that. But Mom won't let us have you committed.

• Danny : I guess every family has to have a black sheep. I always thought ours was Keith.

• Danny : It's not normal for kids to be quiet. I might end up maladjusted.

• Danny : ...Keith, that's the meanest, rottenest and dirtiest trick anyone can play on his sister. No wonder you're my idol.

• Danny : You can't blame me. I'm just a kid.

  Reuben Kincaid : No, you're not. You're a midget in a kid suit.

• Reuben Kincaid : Danny, if you'd like to go to the beach with me, I'll let you swim in the riptide.

  Danny : Riptides are dangerous.

  Reuben Kincaid : Aw, who told you that?

• Keith : You know, I wish you'd read the story of Evel Knievel.

  Danny : Why's that?

  Keith : Well, then maybe you might go take a flying leap.

• Shirley Renfrew Partridge : There's no sense in waiting up. Laurie's in good hands.

  Danny : That's what I'm afraid of.

  Keith : ...I wouldn't worry about him. He's an archaeologist. He can always dig up a girl.

• Christopher "Chris" Partridge #2 : C'mon, let's play a game, Mr. Kincaid.

  Tracy Partridge : Yeah, let's play a game.

  Reuben Kincaid : Okay, okay. Let's play a game called "Lost."

  Danny : How do you play?

  Reuben Kincaid : Well, I'll hide my eyes and you three kids run away from home - far and fast - and keep running until you're lost.

  Tracy Partridge : Then what?

  Reuben Kincaid : In three weeks, I'll come look for you. If I find you, I lose.

  Tracy Partridge : What if you *don't* find us?

  Reuben Kincaid : Well, then I win.

• Danny : You know we think a lot alike.

  Reuben Kincaid : I know and sometimes it scares me.

• Danny : ...A Partridge never forgets. I have a photographic mind.

  Laurie Partridge : Sure you do; unfortunately, you always forget to load the film in it.

• Tracy Partridge : ...If six ducks are on a pond and three more ducks land on the pond, what would you have?

  Danny : Several hundred duck hunters.

• Keith : [to Shirley]  ... Look, you don't want to be a mother to a bunch of illiterate bums, do you?

  Danny : He's right, Mom. Do you want Chris to pump gas all his life, and Tracy to wait on tables in some sleazy strip joint, while I work as a garbage collector... just because you were chicken?

• Danny : ...Chris, Tracy, you'll both understand when you're my age... although *I'm* my age and *I* don't understand.

• Danny : [Keith and Danny are waiting for Laurie to come home from a date with a minister. She enters the front door]  Well?

  Laurie Partridge : Well, what?

  Keith : Tell us what a minister does on a date!

  Danny : I bet he took you to see the Ten Commandments.

  Keith : No. Too racy.

  Laurie Partridge : What makes you think we went to a movie?

  Keith : C'mon, fill us in on the details.

  Laurie Partridge : You really want to know where we went?

  Keith : Yeah.

  Laurie Partridge : Well, we couldn't decide on what movie to see, so... We went straight to Muldoon's Point.

  [she goes upstairs] 

  Danny : I wonder how *he* explains lipstick on his collar?

• Shirley Renfrew Partridge : Danny, when will Keith be able to pay back the money he owes us?

  Danny : If I have it my way, he'll be able to pay in about a year.

  Keith : A year!

  Danny : If Keith has it his way, we'll have to wait for the reading of his will.

• Keith : [the Partridge Family bus detours through the woods en route to their next gig. Danny takes Chris and Tracy for a walk. Tracy and Chris return sans Danny; both are covered with mud, and beaming excitedly]  What happened to you guys? You're a mess!

  Tracy Partridge : Danny found this great place to play!

  Shirley Renfrew Partridge : And he didn't come back with you two? Where *is* Danny?

  Danny : [off in the distance]  HEEELP!

  [That "great place to play" turns out to be a pool of quicksand] 

• Shirley Renfrew Partridge : Whatever gave you the idea you could operate your own Lonely Hearts Club?

  Danny : I didn't think I was doing anything wrong. What you said is, "Reuben needs a wife."

  Reuben Kincaid : I need a *what*?

  Tracy Partridge : I told them to get you a goldfish, but they wouldn't listen.

• Keith : This date is an opportunity.

  Danny : I thought you considered every date an opportunity.

• Shirley Renfrew Partridge : Well, kids, how do you like performing in an amusement park?

  Danny : Great! But it would be *perfect* if cotton candy was deductible.

• Danny : All's fair in love and Parchessi

• Reuben Kincaid : ...Shirley, trust me.

  Danny : That's asking too much.

• Danny : ...You know, we think a lot alike.

  Reuben Kincaid : I know. And sometimes it scares me.

• Reuben Kincaid : ...Good day.

  Danny : It was until now.

• Reuben Kincaid : ...You know, Shirley, I was thinking...

  Danny : In Mr. Kincaid's case, that can be dangerous.

• Danny : ...That's our Keith. Talented, handsome, and wishy-washy.

• Danny : ...So, as an attorney, what do you think of Perry Mason?

• Reuben Kincaid : ...The army hasn't admitted making a mistake since 1952.

  Danny : What happened in 1952?

  Reuben Kincaid : They drafted me.

• Danny : ...Keith, we can't gamble with our family. They're worth a lot more than $156. Even Tracy.

• Reuben Kincaid : ...Tell me, did your mother ever tell you not to play in traffic?

  Danny : Of course.

  Reuben Kincaid : Too bad.

• Reuben Kincaid : ...You have my word as a gentleman.

  Danny : Thanks, but I'd rather have someone watching you.

• Shirley Renfrew Partridge : ...Danny, there's more to life than taking bows.

  Danny : Not when you're an egomaniac with grease paint in your blood.

• Danny : ...I've spied on Keith on lots of dates. Don't bother.

• Keith : ...Now that you've got a million dollars, what's the first thing you're going to do?

  Danny : Gloat.

  Keith : Besides that.

  Danny : Invest it.

  Keith : I think the first thing I'm going to do is charter a boat and sail to the Caribbean.

  Danny : Great. I'll rent it to you.

  Christopher "Chris" Partridge #2 : Why don't you buy a boat, Keith?

  Danny : Because I bought it first.

  Keith : What are you going to do, Chris?

  Christopher "Chris" Partridge #2 : Buy a catcher's mitt...

  Keith : No wonder you're so short. You think small.

  Christopher "Chris" Partridge #2 : ...But then I'm going to buy the Los Angeles Dodgers.

  Danny : I'm not selling.

• Reuben Kincaid : Hey, kid. You want to be among friends?

  Danny : Yeah!

  Reuben Kincaid : Go stand in front of a bug light.

• Keith : You are looking at the King.

  Danny : I didn't know dummies had a King.

• Danny : Mom I've got something I need to tell you.

  Keith : Don't tell me your leaving the group already.

  Danny : Of Course not.

  Keith : I told you not to tell me.

• Danny : All's fair in love and Parcheesi.

  Laurie Partridge : ...Well, to me love is total. It's a direct communication between two people. The key word is honesty.

  Keith : Right. When you love someone you know you can trust them. That's another big part of it. Trust.

  Laurie Partridge : Yes, but you have to earn that. You can't just take it.

  Keith : Sure you can. Haven't you ever heard of stolen kisses?