NEW
Cast:
Kyle Bornheimer ... Sam Briggs
Erinn Hayes ... Melanie Clayton
Nancy Lenehan ... Angela Clayton
Kurtwood Smith ... Dick Clayton
In a Nutshell: Sam Briggs has a lot going for him; the entertainment magazine editor is in love with his girlfriend Melanie. With a baby on the way, the pair are ready to announce their engagement to Melanie's parents. But an assortment of mishaps and follies befall Sam on his way to meet with Melanie's mother, Angela, and Dick, her stern father. Thus, Sam's myriad stumbles all but ensure his relationship with his future in-laws will get off to the wrong start.
The Buzz: A single camera comedy with no laugh track, "Worst Week" looks and feels completely different from the standard CBS sitcom, but the style isn't the element that leaves a person scratching her head at the first episodes. Mind you, it's a very funny pilot. It also happens to be a never-ending parade of farcical situations, one after another after another. This is not to say Americans don't buy farce; 11 seasons of "Frasier" prove otherwise. Even so, that was farce served with a subtle touch and ensconced in brilliant character development and dialogue. This hammers your funny bone repeatedly and refuses to let up for 22 minutes, which seems like it would be a jarring follow-up to the easy deadpan humor of "Two and a Half Men."
Provided you enjoy the opening half hour - which, it should be pointed out, wrings humor out of urine, vomit, and other pungent "delights" -- one has to wonder if it's enough to bring back a wide audience in subsequent weeks for the same kind of fix.
Premieres: 9:30 p.m. Monday, Sept. 22
Cast:
Simon Baker ... Patrick Jane
Robin Tunney ... Teresa Lisbon
Tim Kang ... Kimball Cho
Owain Yeoman ... Wayne Rigsby
Amanda Righetti ... Grace Van Pelt
In a Nutshell: Patrick Jane, a man with extraordinarily sharp observational skills, works as an independent consultant with the California Bureau of Investigation. Although he has a strong success rate with helping solve cases, he finds it hard to get much respect from the bureau's agents, largely due to his past life of limited celebrity claiming to be a psychic medium. Between then and now, he admitted he bamboozled the public, and while one gets the sense that his present work is his way of paying penance, he's also driven to find the serial killer who played a pivotal role in his past.
The Buzz: Does this premise sound familiar to you? That's because you already may have seen a version of this show. "The Mentalist" operates on the same logic as USA's "Psych," minus the funny and plus a lead with smoldering looks. The pilot was solid, but nothing to call your friends about. At the same time, "The Mentalist" seems to be a decent enough fit into CBS's procedural-heavy lineup, and Baker has the kind of fanbase who has been faithful to him since his work on "The Guardian." They'd show up to watch the man read IRS instruction manuals out loud for an hour, so the fact that he's solving crimes is a bonus. As for the name, which sounds more appropriate for an early 20th century vaudeville act, just be thankful it wasn't called "See Jane Notice" or "The Grim Observer."
Premieres: 9 p.m. Tuesday, Sept. 23
Cast:
Jay Mohr ... Gary
Paula Marshall ... Allison
Jaime King ... Vanessa Flood
Ryan Malgarini ... Tom
Kathryn Newton ... Louise
Al Madrigal ... Dennis Lopez
Ed Begley Jr. ... Dr. Walter Krandall
In a Nutshell: Recently divorced Gary is trying to jump back into the dating pool, but with a nosey ex-wife, socially stunted son and a crunchily pacifist daughter never too far away to throw some salt on his game, he's having a tough time of it.
The Buzz: Between the two sitcoms CBS is rolling out this fall, "Gary Unmarried" looks and feels like the sort of comfortable grinner the network trades in. And yes, it has its moments. The half-hour's potentially fatal flaw, though, is that Mohr may be a tough sell as a cuddly single dad recovering from a failed marriage. He's made a career of playing the acerbic funny jerk you love to hate, more Peter Dragon (from long gone but not forgotten Fox comedy "Action") than Danny Tanner. It would seem that "Gary" would be a snug fit in Monday night's laffer lineup, but it has been saddled with the tough task of planting a comedy flag on Wednesday nights. There, it is paired with the barely renewed "The New Adventures of Old Christine,", and its competition is "Pushing Daisies" on ABC, "Knight Rider" on NBC, "Bones" on Fox and "America's Next Top Model" on The CW. Factor in that CBS is not known to be particularly patient with underperforming freshman comedies, and place your bets accordingly.
Premieres: 8:30 p.m. Wednesday, Sept. 24
Cast:
Elizabeth Reaser ... Bella Bloom
Rachel Boston ... Daphne Bloom
Adam Rothenberg ... Augie
Alexandra Breckenridge ... Vivian
Amir Talai ... Cyrus
In a Nutshell: Bella Bloom is a beautiful, successful woman in her thirties. She has her own business, is surrounded by good friends, and lives near the beach. But she's knocked back on her heels when a storefront psychic informs her that she's already dated the man she's supposed to marry, and if she doesn't track him down within the next year, she'll never tie the knot. After sustaining several bonks on the head by omens and signs, she makes a list of all the men she's loved before and begins the process of tracking them down. Sometimes, it gets ugly.
The Buzz: The producers decided to make it perfectly clear that this show is geared toward women by creating an entire subplot revolving around how one character's daring bikini wax affects her boyfriend; the entire premise must not have been enough of an indicator. And darn it if the pilot wasn't adorable in a way that makes a cynic want to shove a finger down her throat, only to relent at the last second and decide to file her nails instead. (It also helps that the first boyfriend Bella encounters is played by Eric Balfour, and he's genuinely funny as her spurned lover -- as opposed to his usual schtick, which is to be accidentally hilarious.) "The Ex List" should pair well with "The Ghost Whisperer," creating an enjoyable evening of pop spiritual mumbo jumbo for a girl to fall back on if her plans go up in smoke. It's hard to find fault with that strategy.
Premieres: 9 p.m. Friday, Oct. 3
Cast:
Rufus Sewell ... Dr. Jacob Hood
Marley Shelton ... Rachel Young
In a Nutshell: This American remake of a British miniseries introduces viewers to Dr. Jacob Hood, a top biophysicist who serves as the government's special science advisor, specializing in averting crises caused by those who would use their skills with beakers, Bunsen burners and Petri dishes for evil. Rachel Young is the FBI agent who has his back.
The Verdict: Now that critics have seen the reworked pilot, there's reason to be quietly optimistic about "Eleventh Hour's" prospects. Two actually: Sewell, and (just as importantly) Jerry Bruckheimer, an executive producer with a strong track record on CBS.
The first mystery involves cloning, and the presentation of the science behind it veers into convoluted territory at times. But Sewell's delivery and the muted earnestness with which he pursues the case should be enough to pull in new viewers. From there it's up to the producers to tinker with the awkward dialogue and pacing, but those flaws are forgivable this early in the game. Given the show's post-"CSI" time slot, the odds are that "Eleventh Hour" will be granted enough time to find its way.
Premieres: 10 p.m. Thursday, Oct. 9
RETURNING
Cast:
Johnny Galecki ... Leonard
Jim Parsons ... Sheldon
Kaley Cuoco ... Penny
Simon Helberg ... Howard Wolowitz
Kunal Nayyar ... Rajesh Koothrappali
Sara Gilbert ... Leslie Winkle
In a nutshell: Leonard and Sheldon, two brilliant physicists, flip when a pretty girl of average intelligence moves into the apartment next door. Leonard is smitten by Penny; Sheldon sees her as an interruption to his carefully honed routine, but eventually exploits the situation to impeccably deliver an assortment of one-liners. Together with their pals Wolowitz and Koothrappali, the nerds continue to flummox the girl, and she still renders Koothrappali mute whenever she's around -- but surprisingly, the girl has learned to accept them.
Where it left us: Leonard never gave up the slim hope that Penny would go out with him, and one fine day (#1.17, "The Tangerine Factor"), after a great deal of contemplation, she finally did. First she had to discover her boyfriend was blogging about their sex life and cheating on her, mind you ... but who cares how Leonard got the girl? They kissed, and that's what matters. As the second season kicks off we'll see whether love blossoms between the beauty and the geek next door - or if she'll fall too hard for World of Warcraft to sustain a relationship with another human being. Massive multiplayer online gaming won't be the only distraction these two will have to contend with: It seems Leslie Winkle, one of Leonard's past hookups, isn't quite out of the picture. Sara Gilbert, with whom Galecki was paired on "Roseanne" many a season ago, becomes a series regular in "Big Bang's" second season.
Premieres: 8 p.m. Monday, Sept. 22
Cast:
Josh Radnor ... Ted
Jason Segel ... Marshall
Alyson Hannigan ... Lily
Neil Patrick Harris ... Barney
Cobie Smulders ... Robin
Bob Saget ... Narrator/voice of future Ted.
In a nutshell: Over the course of several seasons Future Ted tells his children the never-ending story of, you guessed it, how he met their mother. Fans of the show have not minded the fact that he's taking forever to get the point, especially given last season's surprising plot developments. One of them involved a guest star turn by Britney Spears - and as it turns out, she handled it pretty well.
Where it left us: With a break-up, a makeup, and a marriage proposal. A few episodes before the season ending, the bromance between Barney and Ted shattered when Ted found out Barney tapped it with Robin (#3.17, "The Goat"). Concurrently, viewers inched closer to figuring out the titular mother's identity when Sarah Chalke ("Scrubs") guest starred as Ted's flame Stella. She asked him to be her date for her sister's wedding (#3.20, "Miracles"), and he chickened out at what this implied about their relationship, deciding to call the whole thing off instead. Then he got into a cab that was T-boned by a car, and during his short hospital stay realized he was in love with Stella.
Barney also got hit by a bus, and his and Barney's separate brushes with death by automobile prompted the boys to restore their bro status. Then came the cliffhanger: Ted tracked down Stella and apologized ... by way of asking her to marry him. While we don't have any dish about her answer, Chalke is returning for multiple episodes at the beginning of this season.
Premieres: 8:30 Monday, Sept. 22
Cast:
Charlie Sheen ... Charlie Harper
Jon Cryer ... Alan Harper
Angus T. Jones ... Jake Harper
Holland Taylor ... Evelyn Harper
Marin Hinkle ... Judith Harper
Conchata Ferrell ... Berta
In a nutshell: Playboy Charlie Harper took in his mild-mannered, luckless brother Alan and his nephew Jake when Alan's wife kicked him out and for several years now, hilarity has ensued.
Where it left us: Oh, you know - same old Charlie, different season. This time the jingle-writing playboy hooked up with an older woman, Angie (Susan Blakely), who authored several self-help books. Charlie sealed the deal by sleeping with her (#5.19, "Waiting for the Right Snapper"), then proceeded to sabotage the relationship when he realized her son's fiancée happened to be an ex-girlfriend who still had feelings for him. The fiancée dumped Angie's son, leading Angie to call it off with Charlie. So what happens now? The latest news is that Rena Sofer has signed on to guest star in the premiere as a woman whose son bears an uncanny resemblance to Charlie.
This development makes a person wonder. Angus T. Jones, the half man in the household, is a few seasons away from being an adult in the eyes of the law, and this show may outlast his adolescence. TV has a history of dealing with sitcom kids and their growth spurts by tacking on another tyke. Move over, Rudy, here comes Olivia! Step back, Bobby and Cindy, and make room for cousin Oliver! Oh wait ... that didn't work so well.
Sometimes a guest star is simply a guest star, however. Fortunately for us, we don't have to wait that long to find out what the deal is.
Premieres: 9 p.m. Monday, Sept. 22
Cast:
William Petersen ... Gil Grissom
Marg Helgenberger ... Catherine Willows
Gary Dourdan... Warrick Brown
George Eads ... Nick Stokes
Paul Guilfoyle ... Capt. Jim Brass
Eric Szmanda ... Greg Sanders
Robert David Hall ... Dr. Albert Robbins
Wallace Langham ... David Hodges
In a nutshell: What, do we really have to explain this? OK, put it this way - if you commit a crime in Las Vegas and leave behind a mote of DNA or a partial fingerprint, these forensic investigators will catch you and America will enjoy watching them do it.
Where it left us: In shock, to say the least. In the season finale (#8.17, "For Gedda") Warrick is accused of murdering mobster Lou Gedda, a crime boss against whom he held a deep, abiding grudge. He was found at the scene, covered in Gedda's blood, but he insisted he didn't remember anything. Grissom's unyielding faith in his colleague's innocence - and the discovery that he was drugged and framed -- led him and the other CSIs to find enough clues to clear Warrick, although he would be demoted for pursuing his vendetta against Gedda. They also realized there must be a mole in the department. Once he was free to go, the team took Warrick out to celebrate. Afterward, he got into his car by himself and was intercepted by Undersheriff McKeen.
McKeen congratulated Warrick before shooting him at close range, twice, and leaving him slumped over the steering wheel.
The ninth season opener is called "For Warrick," and it's best not to reveal much more about it than that. We're happy to report that it's a stupendous resolution to one of the more gripping episodes in the series' history. Sara Sidle (Jorja Fox) makes an appearance, a tidbit that has been widely reported. (Friends circle the ranks during tough times.)
Also previously announced, Lauren Lee Smith ("The L Word") joins the team this season. She plays CSI Bryce Adams, characterized in a CBS press release "as a smart, flirtatious, and witty non-conformist who entered law enforcement to rebel against her judgmental psychiatrist father."
Even more shocking than Warrick's shooting was the announcement of William Petersen's departure from the series. Laurence Fishburne is joining the cast to fill the hole left by Petersen's exit, and his first appearance will be in this season's ninth episode. According to a CBS press release, Fishburne's character is a former pathologist teaching a college course in criminalistics. He'll first cross paths with the team during a murder investigation, which leads to his joining the Las Vegas Crime Lab as a Level-1 CSI. Welcome to the seedy underbelly of Las Vegas, Morpheus!
Premieres: 9 p.m. Thursday, Oct. 9
Cast:
David Caruso ... Horatio Caine
Emily Procter ... Calleigh Duquesne
Adam Rodriguez ... Eric Delko
Jonathan Togo ... Ryan Wolfe
Rex Linn ... Det. Frank Tripp
Eva LaRue ... Natalia Boa Vista
In a nutshell: See nutshell summation for "CSI," sub in Miami for Las Vegas, and add a pair of sunglasses that forensic team leader Horatio Caine uses to convey emotional poignancy.
Where it left us: First Warrick, then Horatio? Man, CSIs are dropping like flies on CBS. Untangling a murder leads Horatio to discover a conspiracy involving illegal ammo dealers, a shady ATF agent, and his son Kyle's psycho stepfather Ron (#6.21,"Going Ballistic"). Handily, said stepfather married Horatio's ex-girlfriend Julia in the finale, a development that made the investigator fear for Kyle and Julia's safety: He was convinced Ron wanted kill Julia and Kyle to get to their money. But Horatio may never find out what Ron's plans were, because while he was waiting at an airstrip to make sure his ex and kid got out of town, he was shot down by an unknown assailant.
Who pulled the trigger? And why did Detective Ryan Wolfe receive a text message that said "It is done," moments after Caine fell?
Premieres: 10 p.m. Tuesday, Sept. 22
Cast:
Joe Mantegna ... David Rossi
Thomas Gibson ... Aaron Hotchner
Paget Brewster ... Emily Prentiss
Shemar Moore ... Derek Morgan
Matthew Gray Gubler ... Dr. Spencer Reid
A.J. Cook ... Jennifer "J.J." Jareau
Kirsten Vangsness ... Penelope Garcia
In a nutshell: The Behavioral Analysis Unit, a special team of FBI profilers, hunts down serial killers. We feel safer already.
Where it left us: The team flew to New York City to examine a string of murders committed by an unidentified gunman in a black hooded sweatshirt, whose M.O. is to walk up to random civilians in public places and shoot them, point blank. Sifting through the details led the team to discover the crimes were being committed by multiple gunmen, apparently part of one well-trained squad with knowledge of police procedures, and with the skills to hack into city surveillance. The episode ended with the team members getting into several SUVs, and one of them blowing up. Oof! Tough time to be a crime fighter on the Tiffany Network. Jason Alexander, Wil Wheaton and Luke Perry are set to guest star during the upcoming season, and Meta Golding is set to step in while A.J. Cook is on maternity leave. According to E! Online, she makes her first appearance in October.
Premieres: 9 p.m. Wednesday, Sept. 24
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